Life of Gordy

The Handsomest Prince

I wrote this story. I hope it inspires you. Once upon a time, there was a prince who was handsomest in all the world. Everybody liked to look at him, but the person who liked to look at him most was himself. Whenever he felt sad, he looked at himself in the mirror and was […]

TICKED OFF

But honestly though, going to Loch Ness was really cool. The loch was beautiful and it was a close jaunt from Inverness (the city where I was staying). Very cool, you should go. I had one setback, though. To get to Loch Ness, I had walked along the highway on the east side of the River Ness, which […]

Heart of Asia

When I first came to Taiwan, the plan was to stay for six months, but in the back of my head I hoped and knew it would be longer because: 1) I wanted to be here longer (that’s not a real reason). 2) I felt like it would be longer (that’s also not a real […]

Sporty Gordy

“Have you ever played baseball?” “No.” “But you are American!” NOW Taiwan Dad was asking the hard questions. It hadn’t been so hard for him to recruit me onto his softball team. He’d called earlier in the week and asked, “Gordy, can you come to my softball game this Saturday?” I replied, “Will there be food? — […]

You can never run from sharks.

As I’ve mentioned before, my biggest fear is sharks. I hate them. They will eat you. They will eat you. Even so, I really like swimming. I’m from freaking California, it’s in my body. So when I was visiting Hong Kong, I went to Stanley Beach. It’s a nice beach because it’s clean and secluded.  Plus, my […]

Faithful Muslims

“They’re gonna kill us!” I was shouting like a crazy person. I didn’t really believe they’d kill us, but I knew if they caught us, they’d hurt us. It was the 4th of July and I was less than a month from finishing my mission in Russia. I’d managed to survive this long without getting […]

Bye, Grandma

The whole day hiking in Kaohsiung, it had been windy and rainy. Some people on the hike had said that a typhoon was coming in, but in my experience, Taiwanese people say that every time it’s rainy and cloudy, so I didn’t put any stock into what they were saying. On my way back to […]

MONKEYS GOT HATERS TOO

I went into a jungle the next day. By Kaohsiung is a small mountain called Shoushan and it’s a designated national park. I had been there and explored a bit the day before when Taiwan Grandma dropped me off, but I saved the heavy hiking for the next day. I was very excited to go because there were supposed […]

Let’s be Catholics.

The next day was Sunday. Taiwan Grandma isn’t a member of the Mormon church, but Taiwan Mom said she recently agreed to meet with the missionaries (still hasn’t tho), so I asked Taiwan Mom if I should invite Taiwan Grandma to church. Taiwan Mom said I should, so I did. What actually ended up happening […]

She told me I smell weird.

The first thing she said to me was, “You smell weird.” At least, that’s probably what she said. I had taken a train to a city called Kaohsiung (pronounced “gow-shong” — SO WHY IS IT SPELLED WITH A K ????) for the weekend. Taiwan was having a holiday, which meant a rare three-day weekend, and […]